Maggots

Jim was not a bad cook and took pride in his meals, getting the most flavour anyone could out of spuds, onions and any meat they had. They had killed a roo a few days earlier and were enjoying the extra meat. But when Jim got it out that afternoon, he discovered it was fly blown with little white maggots crawling all through it.

'Shit!' Jim said out loud. 'Shit! Shit!'

'What's the matter?' asked Greg who was the only one within ear shot.

'Bloody meat's blown!' Jim grunted angrily. 'It's this bloody heat!'

'Ahh Shit!' Greg joined him. 'I was looking forward to ya stew mate. You make one of the best!'

'Well ya not getting it now! We'll have to chuck the bloody lot! Shit!'

Greg stood thoughtfully for a moment. 'Maybe we won't. Maybe we can still use this meat to have some fun.'

'What are you talking about? The only thing this meat's good for is the dogs,' Jim grizzled.

'We know we can't eat it but what about the lads?' A wicked gleam crept into his eye, 'They don't know nothing, and I've got a bloody idea. Get the other two and I'll fill you in.'

Later that night around the campfire it began. Jim served up his kangaroo stew thick with gravy. At first glance, it seemed fine but when looked at closely,
things began to crawl. As prearranged, the men began to eat their stew, at least they acted as though they were, pushing the food from side to side, popping a piece of potato in their mouths and chewing furiously as if it was meat. They grunted and 'mmm'd' as though it was one of the best stews ever. The lads had sat down last not suspecting anything. Rob picked up a piece of meat on his fork and was about to put it in his mouth when Andy stopped him.

'Rob!' He yelled, 'Stop! What's on your fork?'

Rob pulled it back from his mouth to get a better look. There, on his piece of meat was a little white maggot wriggling from one side to the other.

Rob screamed and dropped the fork on his plate. 'My food's got bugs in it!'

Expecting a reaction, the lads looked at the men. Jim was diligently chasing a lump of meat on his plate whilst quietly pushing the maggots to one side.

Harry, who was busy putting salt and pepper in his stew looked up and said with a big smile, 'Can someone pass the dead horse please?' Seeing Rob's growing look of horror, he added. 'Tomato sauce mate, pass the tomato sauce.'

Roy just smirked at Rob and casually commented, 'Ahh, they're not bugs mate. They're maggots. They add extra flavour!' Rob sat in disbelief, his eyes bulging out of his head and jaw dropped open. Andy couldn't control himself any longer. 'You're n-not going to ea-eat it, are you?'

Greg snickered and gave him a wink, 'Come on boys. Bit a' protein. Ya' need all the extra protein ya' can get out here. Don't taste so bad either.'

With that he found the juiciest piece of meat full of maggots, pushed it onto his fork and popped it into his mouth. He proceeded to chew calmly. All of a sudden, he grinned exposing the two wide gaps in his front teeth that were now full of white fleshy maggots wriggling and squirming trying to get out,
their little heads bobbing up and down in their frantic effort to escape. It was too much for the two young lads. With their hands over their mouths, they shot up and ran for the bush. The men could hear them heaving and vomiting. Quickly the men scraped their plates empty into the scrap bucket conveniently hidden close by and sat back down. When Andy and Rob finally stumbled back the men were wiping their plates clean with crusts of damper, congratulating Jim on his flavoursome stew.

'You really went all out tonight Jim,' Harry commented happily. 'That was the best stew I've ever tasted!'

'Yeah Jim. Don't know what it was but there was somethin' extra in the flavour. Just made all the bloody difference. Gotta do that one again, don't ya reckon Greg?' Roy continued heartily.

Greg spoke matter of fact, 'So boys, ya gonna eat your stew?'

Andy looked up, his face very green. 'No. No we're not going to eat it. Sorry. We're just not feeling too good.'

'Oh, come on lads!' Roy entreated with a huge grin. 'It's bloody good bush tucker. Ya can go home and tell 'em all how ya ate
real bloody meatin the outback.'